#speechless

The past couple of days, I’ve just been so speechless…I just don’t even know what to say anymore. everyone believes what everyone else is saying instead of what I have to say, kinda like how I was kicked out of school. All the blame ends up on me and I end up hurt…i am really just thinking of cuddling up in the corner of my bedroom and just staying there away from the world..I deny the integrity of this painful experience..believe me it’s worst then most think it is..but I think of it as a valuable source of guidance..that’s how it gets turned into process..I don’t know what to do anymore, i try, I LITERALLY FUCKING TRY….and I end up hated, what’s the point if that’s the outcome each time? I’m just a soul with intentions of good, but i’m soo understood..I don’t know who to¬† be anymore,,,I be me and i’ts not enough….I be something entirely different and I end up hurting me and my loved ones…I’ve been told that i’m nothing, ugly, pathritc, an abomination…I was even told to go kill myself..I was lead to believe all this..I don’t know what to believe anymore..I don’t know who to trust..my mind and feeling have been fucked with so many times…i don’t know what to do…one minutes im happy as can be, the next just ready to give up…but I guess that’s what happens when you try to change your fate….

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